Saturday, March 15, 2014

Today's mail

As I am in the full blown panic of setting up a birthday party for my soon-to-be 8 year-old my oldest goes out and gets the mail.  In the mail is a packet that I requested from the county Foster & Adoptive Services office.  She is super excited.  I keep trying to tell her that we are "thinking and researching" and that does not guarantee that we will be doing anything.  I fear her excitement.  I don't know where this is going to lead and she instantly assumes this means things will go as she has planned.  I wish she had not seen that packet.  How do we teach our children that "maybe" does not always translate to "yes but later".  I have said maybe to several things over their life time and every time it turns out to be "no" as the final answer our children are devastated.  I am left not wanting them to know anything until it is a yes answer but then I feel like that is sending them a wrong message as well.  Then they only ever hear yes.  But this is not ice cream or a movie night... this is a growth to the family -- a step that MUST not be taken lightly.  This is something that must be prayed about -- A LOT!  Sometimes I think that I need to be the only one who goes to the mailbox.  No matter what happens with adoption I am still left wondering how much I should let my kids know so that their hopes are not always dashed and how much they need to learn that the answer is not always 'yes'.

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